Sunday, July 11, 2010

Discipline Update & Freewrite: July 11

Well, I am NOT going for a walk today. Yesterday put blisters on my feet, so I've gotta get new sneakers. I've been saying that I needed them for... at least a month. But. It is time to do that today. Today, today, TODAY.

And it's going to be tough to go walking tomorrow through Wednesday, too, because I'm supposed to be at school at 8:30 to help out with summer remediation for our re-testers. I really need to get to bed earlier, but it's so hard! I look at the clock, and hey, wow, it's quarter of one.

Plus, mornings are lonely cuz the Hunk sleeps in. Why would I want to ADD to that? :(

UGH, I don't wanna write. I'd rather play spider solitaire. I'd rather surf the net. I'd rather... I dunno. But I am gonna take a break to boil some eggs.

Only two left. Running kind of low. Bread, too. That's one of the down-sides to eating at the house more often - or trying to: the grocery bill goes up!

I'd rather go back to bed.

Writing makes me think of one of the songs from Wicked - "What Is This Feeling?" is the title, I think. And yes, that's what this feeling is: LOATHING! UNADULTERATED LOATHING! Yeech.

I'd rather watch Hulu. Or Netflix. Or... actually I do kinda wanna go back to bed.

Course my eggs is boilin tho.

I'd rather load the dishwasher.

Ugh. 240. I've still got twice as much suffering ahead as what I've endured... TODAY! And tomorrow, guess what: there's MORE!

tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow... it creeps in this wretched pace from day to day, to the last syllable of those 750 words.

At least Macbeth didn't have to WRITE ABOUT IT.

Okay, focus, C. Let's think about what actually does need to get done today. Shoe shopping - woo. Need to email the guidance counselor and ask about getting a course list. We were supposed to have that last month. Need to contact the photographers about some kid's senior portrait. Need to call the list of re-testers I'm supposed to contact.

Agatha needs her catalytic converter replaced, and it sounds like her joints are aching. I'm not sure what to-do the Hunk has for today, but I might send him out to get that taken care of this afternoon and do my calling then.

Eggs are boiled and toast is up. And I've got juice. Whee.

I so want to be done with this. I know there's no way I'm remotely close. *sigh*

423. And I'm sooo tired of it. I don't have anything to say. I don't have anything I want to say. I don't have anything I can think of saying.

Well, that's not entirely true. I already know what my "real post" is going to be about, but I had anted to kind of save it so that I wouldn't be, you know, double-dipping.

So much for that idea.

Mmm, breakfast.

So on Thursday I get my MRI, and then not tomorrow but next Monday I have a follow-up office visit. I'm hoping that later that week, I can get all of my surgery taken care of, except for reconstruction, which will have to come later because I'll probably need radiation as well. I'd like to get my radiation started as soon after surgery as I can. The sooner I get started, the sooner I'm done.

I wonder if you can do chemotherapy along with radiation or if I'll have to wait until I finish radiation before starting chemo.

Suck. I'm only at 591.

Mostly I want to get into my post-op body as soon as I can. I'd like to spend as little time boobless as possible. The whole menopause thing has me a bit nervous, but so far it sounds like it hasn't been too bad on my mom's side of the family.

I still have "Trashin' the Camp" running through my head. I've started to choreograph it. I think it'll be fun - it's playful and kind of sassy.

I'm definitely worried about how this will affect my dancing.

And I've got cramps. They're not as bad as they were yesterday or the day before, but they're still poking at me. Lemme tell you, I am NOT upset about saying goodbye to all that!

I haven't been able to get to the library's website for a few days. I hope I don't have anything either due or waiting for me up at the circ desk.

Hm. I finished breakfast - two boiled eggs, two slices of buttered toast, and a glass of juice. And I'm still pretty hungry.

Oh, thank God. That's 750+!


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